It is impossible to see the light if you have closed your eyes.

It may seem that it will take long. How ‘long’ is defined can differ from person to person.

Does it matter that for how long the problem is going to stay?

Or, that you are staying strong and ensuring you take steps for your well-being?

Make the ‘growth’ choice instead of a ‘fear’ choice.

But how do we grow in face of what has passed?

One way is to clearly see that what has happened. ACCEPT. Yes, it is completely normal to deny and be upset about it. But only for a while.

It is a cycle.

Your belief leads to an action. Everything you put in the universe gives you something of the same energy in return. Thus, a negative belief leads to a negative response, which in turn reinforces your beliefs. For instance,

How well you improve depends upon the foundation you lay for yourself. It all begins with your mind. Feed it right! Because positive thoughts will lead to positive results. For example, someone who believes that his/her bladder can be managed better will find out the ways to do so from a doctor.

Therefore,

You can understand that there are two aspects of Hope. It is not merely positive thinking. If it is just that, then it is quite shallow.

A hopeful person believes s/he has AGENCY i.e., perceived strength and resources to reach his/her goal. And, s/he find PATHWAYS- his/her ability to engage in goal-directed behavior.

Now you know why I am not saying it is shallow. Because hoping also involves taking action.

Worrying takes up energy and stress can make you weak. This cannot even bring to your mind that there is something you can do to alleviate it.

चिंता ऐसी डाकिनी, काटि करेजा खाए |

वैद्य बिचारा क्या करे, कहां तक दवा खवाय॥

There is hope. There is always hope. Why should you give up even before trying or knowing the whole picture? Nobody is stopping you to be upset about it but it is for you to realize that it will not give good results. It is better if it is not too late.

करता रहा सो क्यों रहा, अब करी क्यों पछताए |

बोये पेड़ बबूल का, अमुआ कहा से पाए ||

Let us now try to understand setting realistic and achievable goals for yourself. I will give you a simple example of me trying to lose weight.

1. How important is achieving this goal on a scale of 1 to 5?

• 5-Very important. To achieve the ideal weight according to height and avoid any illness.
• To control diet and avoid heart disease and diabetes, which I can be prone to because my parents have it.

2. How would I feel after I lose weight? (Future memory)?

• I will feel more active.
• I will feel less afraid for my heart.
• Meditation will help me be calmer and more relaxed. 

3. Who can help me in achieving me goal?

• The one who cooks
• My resolve-avoiding unhealthy food, ensuring that I exercise every day.
• My husband- by giving me company and motivating me.

4. Remind yourself of the time when you did manage to achieve your goals.

This exercise has the capacity to make you understand that only your efforts will bring about results. See,

श्रम से ही सब कुछ होत है, बिन श्रम मिले कुछ नाही |

सीधे ऊँगली घी जमो, कबसू निकसे नाही ||